1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
3. People who say, “Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too.” Screw you! What good is a friggin cake if you can’t eat it? What, should I eat someone else’s cake instead?
4. People who say, “It’s always in the last place you look”. Of course it is. Why the hell would I keep looking after I’ve found it?
5. People who ask “Can I ask you a question?” Didn’t really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?
6. People who say something is “new and improved”. So which is it? If it’s new, then there has never been anything before it. If it’s an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
7. People who say, “Life is short.” What the hell? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever friggin does! What? Are they going to do something that’s longer than life?
8. People who ask, “Did you see that?” while watching a movie. Hell no! I paid to come to the cinema to stare at the ceiling.
9. People who ask, while you are waiting for the bus, “Did the bus come yet?” If the bus came, would I still be standing here?
10. People who expect me to complete this damn list.
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